


A promise he couldn't keep

by Beth22_woofie



Series: Winter Child |JohnTen X NCT otp oneshots| [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Dark, Death, I am sorry not sorry, I just really love angst because I am as lonely af, I love angst, Imagination, Love Triangle, M/M, Mental, Psychic, Psychologyical, hallucination, johnten, taeten - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-09-13
Packaged: 2018-08-14 21:08:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8029012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beth22_woofie/pseuds/Beth22_woofie
Summary: 'Forever' a promise Youngho couldn't keep.





	A promise he couldn't keep

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for another chrs and had posted it before...but I need JohnTen and there isn't enough out there...so here goes nothing

Polaroids decorate the white cream wall of their room. Every single picture presenting two people smiling happily at the camera or at the other.

There were, though pictures of him alone smiling at the camera with his fingers linked to a person off screen or him walking, hands still linked with the mysterious person.

Youngho scanned the pictures, one by one smiling just before it slid off his lips. Fingers tracing the word 'forever'. In the picture a couple of hands with silver rings zoomed in with the symbol of infinity engraved neatly.

They thought they would have their happy forever after, but now that became something they can't keep anymore. Youngho has moved on while Chittaphon is still stuck with memories. Youngho plucks the petals and Chittaphon stores them in between the pages of his story. Youngho feels guilty for it, but he can't help it either.

Youngho shifted and turned around watching silently as Chittaphon stared off into space again from across the bed he was sitting on. He lowered his head not able to handle the other's unfocused gaze on his direction. He felt guilt pressuring up in his stomach. Minutes passed by before Chittaphon sigh softly and proceeded to smile for once after a week.

Youngho lifted his gaze hearing the sound of the other's dry laugh. He blinked and Chittaphon chuckled.

"Johnny.." he called "Johnny"

_"What is it Ten-ah?"_

"Let's go on a date" shocked, Youngho's tongue got tied.

_"Ten-ah.."_

"Please.. Johnny?" Youngho felt his chest tightening and his arms hang tiredly by his side. 'Just this once' he told himself.

_"Okay"_

Youngho never moved from his position as Chittaphon dresses for the day. He has to admit he still finds the other beautiful with his messy hair. His eyes shifted to the silver ring the smaller still wears and another sliding freely on his index finger. His.

Chittaphon's thumb rubs at the silver on his index before smiling at Youngho.

"Let's go"

Dragging his feet heavily on the floor Youngho followed his once lover. He wills to follow the thin boy anywhere he wants to go.

They arrived at a local restaurant and sat at the corner. Chittaphon ordered for them. Youngho didn't miss people peeking at them curiously while the delicate boy seems oblivious to it.

They walked in silence for the day. Chittaphon leading the way and the taller just followed. Like he promised.  
No holding of hands.

Somehow they reached their old High School. The place they met. Chittaphon was the school's best dancer while Youngho was a pianist. They were requested to collaborate for the school's function at the end of the second semester and they found love along the lines of music notes and graceful moves.

Even before entering the said place, Youngho knew where Chittaphon had wanted to go. The music room.

Chittaphon sat and closed his eyes trying to collect the notes again. He played it just like how a beginner would but it sounded heavenly to Youngho because his lover or to say, his ex-lover had finished the song he wrote before their break-up. Youngho danced to it and the one sitting behind the piano could see their silhoutte gliding together at the empty space.

"I knew something was wrong since that day you stopped smiling at me"

It got kind of dark when they headed back home. Which to Youngho is no longer a home. But today he promised to stay.

That night they slept at each side of the bed. Chittaphon hugged a pillow to his chest and closed his tired lids. Youngho got up from the bed and walked to the other side watching the calm expression of Chittaphon's face highlighted by the moon. So, he knelt down beside his ex-lover and kiss his temple.

Youngho watch with concern eyes as the smaller prepares breakfast for two. He's not trying to stop trying. It bugs the taller to no end but still he says nothing because he knows the other will never hear him out. Not when he was the one who could not hold still to the promise he made.

He lets the smaller do what he wants. Go on silent dates where the on-lookers would whisper and talk behind their backs. The restaurant they visited would always have a whole plate of food left untouched on Youngho's side. Not that Youngho ate any of the breakfast and dinner the smaller prepares at home.

Youngho never ate them but it never stopped the other from making his favourites. Youngho never begins conversations or touch any part of the other's skin. He lets Chittaphon's hair fall on his face when the wind was too harsh on some days. But no, the smaller never stops.

The sad thing was that no matter how Chittaphon tries hard to make everything better again, to make it okay again, Youngho knows it will never work, can never work anymore. He can't go back to how he used to be or give the other what he really wants.

Youngho felt dry, sometimes he would break down. Hurt, pain and guilt creeping it's way to every part of him. Three solid months has gone but they were still stuck in their daily routine of Chittaphon trying to hold onto Youngho when the taller had already left their shared world.

 _"Ten-ah please stop"_ he begged one day but the smaller kept on walking.

They were at the back of their house and flowers of different colors stretch across the garden. Chittaphon had planted them the moment they moved in together. After the taller proposed to him.

 _"You need to stop doing this to me, to us"_ Chittaphon paid no mind to what the other was saying and began plucking at some baby's breath.

 _"I can't come back to you and you know that, please move on Ten.."_ Seven red roses.

 _"Please let me go"_ tying them in a bundle with pure white ribbon he smiled.  
"Okay Johnny, I will let you go"

 

They walked through the crowd and Youngho knows what people they passes by were thinking. They thought that his ex-lover was crazy. Some people would look at the smaller sadly, pitying him. People at the restaurants they went too. His ex-lover was always put on the spotlight for being a crazy person.

They finally reach the place they were heading for today. Their last day together for after exactly three months of playing pretend. Youngho close his eyes. He's going to miss this too just as much as the other. This is their last date so Youngho couldn't cry. Shouldn't cry. He has to be strong for the smaller.

Closing his eyes to prevent the tears from rolling down, he plays back the memories he had of them. From the day he fell for those dull and tired eyes that were once bright and beautiful. The dead strands of hair that used to shine and the liveliness of the smaller's skin which is now peeked in by bones. Images of laughter, voices and sobs flashes in his head with kisses and nights spent together. Him proposing at the library and countless times of 'I love you' exchanged between them.

He chuckles to himself because he's finding it hard to let go when he had begged the other to let go. He remembers their first date of pretend. The song willing back into his head. The smaller playing his song.

"Johnny" He hears him whisper softly. A quiet sob leaving his lips before he quickly wiped the tears and coughed before smiling. The smile that blinded him always and it still does.

"Goodbye.. . Johnny" he watches for a moment and when the smile never left the other's lips, then Youngho knew he was going to be okay.

He turns on his heel and let his worries subside because even though his love still misses him, he was smiling so brightly and promised to be happy for him. He promised him.

He stops on his track and that was when he saw the bright light. He was lifted off the ground and the next second, he was gone.

 

 

 

_**Three years later~** _

 

Two entwined hands with silver metal bands embracing around both their ring fingers. They walk happily together side by side as the passerby admires the love blossoming from the two.

Chittaphon held onto the baby's breath he plucked that day and stared up at his lover that was by his side. He met him three years ago and he had stayed by his side and helped him get through life. Took in all his sorrows even though he tried to keep them inside. Oftentimes he got stuck and ran back to the memories he and Youngho had but he never got tired of helping him glue himself together.

When they finally got to the place Chittaphon let go of his now lover's hand and proceeded to lay the flowers down by the stone.

"Johnny" he called "I finally moved on" he turned around and lifted his hand asking for the other to take it.

"This is Taeyong" he continued "Hope you are happy for me from up there"

 

The same place he last went on a date with Youngho. The place he let go of Youngho. The place he saw bright lights after he said goodbye to Youngho and he knows the giant went to heaven that day he let go, that last day he held his once beautiful giant back from crossing over. That same place they buried Youngho three months before. Youngho died from brain cancer. It was too late when they found out and Youngho died just a month later. They had planned to get married and the taller had kept the secret of his severe headache for far too long. It was too late to save him.

 

Taeyong looped his arms around his lover's waist and kissed his temple.

 

"I promise to keep him happy and safe Johnny" the other smiled contentedly against his chest.

 

 

' _Forever_ ' a promise Youngho couldn't keep.


End file.
